The silly thread!

[pendragon1998]

So that all of your silly people can keep from bothering your silly neighbors with silliness, just post your silly stuff in this silly thread.

 

I will begin with my new-found approach to eBay coin auctions:

(I can do this in one out of 30 auctions and have a 97% positive f/b profile)

[harvey8542]

Bobcat

[Oldtrader3]

Maybe you have hit on something that I can live with! Funny post!

[ant]

so you were the one that sent me that cat!

 

great lil toon

[WinstonWare]

Elephant themed...

 

 

[MunkyMan95]

 

 

 

 

I'll let you draw your own conclusions on this one...

 

 

[EZ_E]

.

[CAP Freak]

[braddick]

[physics-fan3.14]

Sorry, OT3, sometimes people just need a good laugh.

 

To go along with the bobcat....

[ldhair]

This thread should not be on this forum. It has nothing to do with coins.

[ant]

that is some funny stuff. and the pope one topped it off

[Just Bob]

[Oldtrader3]

I liked the blond and the Ferrari, personally, having been divorced (3) times. That's why I haven't and never will drive a Ferrari.

[Oldtrader3]

A Blond is speeding and gets stopped by a blond cop. The blond cop asks for a driver's license and the blond ask what's a driver's license look like? The blond cop responds that it has your picture on it. The blond rummages through her purse and finds her compact mirror, looks at it, says this must be it and hands it to the blond cop. The blond cop looks in the compact mirror and says, oh, I wouldn't have stopped you if I knew that you were a cop too.

[Jeffrey Cardona]

A Blond is speeding and gets stopped by a blond cop. The blond cop asks for a driver's license and the blond ask what's a driver's license look like? The blond cop responds that it has your picture on it. The blond rummages through her purse and finds her compact mirror, looks at it, says this must be it and hands it to the blond cop. The blond cop looks in the compact mirror and says, oh, I wouldn't have stopped you if I knew that you were a cop too.

 

 

LMAO!!!

 

They are all great! Thanks for laugh guys!!

[bsshog40]

Nice to see everyone enjoying each others posts again!! What comradery we have!!

[cpm9ball]

A blonde sees a woman in a canoe paddling like mad out in the middle of a cornfield. She asks her what the heck she is doing, and the woman replies, "I'm canoeing! Why don't you join me? It's fun!" The blonde replies, "I'd like to, but I can't swim."

 

Chris

[WinstonWare]

[EZ_E]

A Washington DC airport ticket agent offers some examples of why our country is in trouble!

 

[font:Comic Sans MS]

 

1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window. (On an Airplane!)

 

 

 

2. I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the Passport information, then she interrupted me with, 'I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts .' Without Trying to make her look stupid, I calmly explained, 'Cape Cod is in Massachusetts , Capetown is in Africa .' Her response - click.

 

 

 

3. A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando . He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that's not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He Replied, 'Don't lie to me, I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state!' (OMG)

 

 

 

4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked, 'Is it possible to see England from Canada ?' I said, 'No.' She said, 'But they look so Close on the map.' (OMG, again!)

 

 

 

5. An aide for a cabinet member once called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had Only a 1-hour layover in Dallas . When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, 'I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will Need a car to drive between gates to save time.' (Aghhhh)

 

 

 

6. An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 am got to Chicago at 8:33 am. I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois , but she couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that.

 

 

 

7. A New York lawmaker called and asked, 'Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to Whom?' I said, 'No, why do you ask?' She replied, 'Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said (FAT), and I'm overweight. I think that's very rude! After putting her on hold for a minute while I looked into it (I was laughing). I came back and explained the city code for Fresno , CA Is (FAT - Fresno Air Terminal), and the airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.

 

 

 

8. A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii . After going over all the cost info, she asked, 'Would it be cheaper to Fly to California , and then take the train to Hawaii ?'

 

 

 

9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who asked, 'How do I know which plane to get on?' I asked him what exactly he meant, to Which he replied, 'I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes have numbers on them.'

 

 

 

10. A lady Senator called and said, 'I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola , Florida . Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?' I Asked if she meant fly to Pensacola , FL. On a commuter plane. She said, 'Yeah, whatever, smarty!'

 

 

 

11. A senior Senator called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him that he needed a visa. 'Oh, no I don't. I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those.' I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, 'Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express!'

 

 

 

12. A New Mexico Congress woman called to make reservations, 'I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York .' I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, 'Are you sure that's the name of the town?' 'Yes, what flights do you have?' replied the lady. After some searching, Icame back with, 'I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Rhino anywhere.' The lady retorted, 'Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!' So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, 'You don't mean Buffalo , do you?' The reply? 'Whatever! I knew it was a big animal.'

 

 

 

Now you know why the Government is in the shape it's in!

 

 

 

Could some people be this IGNORANT?

 

 

 

YES,......THEY WALK AMONG US…..and vote!!

[/font]

[jackson64]

an oldie and a goodie.....The Buffalo Theory of Intelligence

 

In one episode of Cheers, Cliff is seated at the bar describing the Buffalo Theory to his buddy, Norm. I don't think I've ever heard the concept explained any better than this.

 

 

 

 

 

“Well you see, Norm, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Now, as we know, excessive intake of alcohol kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. And that, Norm, is why you always feel smarter after a few beers.”

 

[Oldtrader3]

It is like Will Rogers said, "If you got what you paid for from government, just think how bad it would be".

 

Why don't government workers look out the window in the morning? Answer, they have to have something to do in the afternoon.

[Jeffrey Cardona]

It is like Will Rogers said, "If you got what you paid for from government, just think how bad it would be".

 

Why don't government workers look out the window in the morning? Answer, they have to have something to do in the afternoon.

 

Myself being a federal employee...I find it quite funny.....so damn funny because it's so damn true!!!!

[pendragon1998]

“Well you see, Norm, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Now, as we know, excessive intake of alcohol kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. And that, Norm, is why you always feel smarter after a few beers.”

 

 

That, in turn, reminds me of the Simpson's episode where Homer staggers out of the tavern completely drunk, and sits in his car.

 

"Wait a minute...I shouldn't drive. I'm drunk."

"No, wait. I'm drunk. I shouldn't trust my judgement. I should drive."

 

Vroom.

[Coin]

I think someone here told this one in a joke crib , but do not remember who gets the credit(sorry?you are still a hero!) , however , it is a favorite of mine :

 

A cop stops a kid for running a stop sign . After he walks up to the teen-age driver , the officer asks "Why didn't you stop, for that stop sign ,back there , sir?"

 

To which the teenager replies: " What? I SLOWED down.....nuthin wuz coming....what's the big deal?"

 

The officer then tells the young man to please step out of his car , and... as the kid does so , the cop starts hitting him with his baton !

 

The kid yelps out "Hey , Hey ! Stop! Stop! "

 

To which the officer replies : "You want me to STOP ......or SLOW down?"

[ant]

[pendragon1998]

I like this: