Coin Vault and Hard Of Hearing Folks

[PovertyRow]

I enjoy ocassionally tuning into Coin Vault just to see how badly pure facts and statistics can be presented (these 2004 Silver Eagles are in MS69! And then they often discuss how much a MS69 Morgan would go for, as if there were any relevance.)

 

Anyway, had close-captioning on to study a fave movie on tv and after the movie switched to Coin Vault and the Close Captioning was still on. Following are absolute verbatim samples of their close captioning.

 

"Have two ways to do a vault fanatic is a 10: moffat and on the 10: moffat the saving of lilly clicking. Plus you are paying $3 less for corn."

 

"The very first prices fell mummy talk to those of you out there of that have acquired the men's state 69 silver eagle said."

 

" Let me just point l.i. have been last year been in minst sets them the they were $169 a loving gradfather trading at $499.

 

"20 deaths 609 dumbbell green get a perfect in the king count come in a box and the 20 out comes in the vault."

 

"Like mellon you confirm six c nine quality."

 

"Have acquired the men's state 69 silver eagle said."

 

"On is say your just a couple of seconds i have gotten literally hundreds of females."

 

"The bottom line is ngc and pc dos are vying to be very conservative in the way that means a lot of the arm it safe 70."

 

"Lot of the arm it safe 70."

 

"I've bought seven or eight of those other encapsulates and services or seven and eight of those companies and all of have individuals the have no way shovelful on others nobody as 90 of the sell rules them safe and then dive since then in the fall much engraved."

 

Anyway - more there is but you get the pic. But sometimes I have to wonder if the close captions are more truthful.

 

While these are funny, have to wonder what the folks who NEED close captioning are thinking!

[Hoot]

 

Thiss one slayed me:

 

"On is say your just a couple of seconds i have gotten literally hundreds of females."

 

Sounds like a bull elk in a harem.

 

Maybe the hearing impaired are better off getting such garble. That way they're not tempted to buy.

 

Great laughs. Hoot

[Beijim]

Those are a riot. So, did you order any of those men's state females? I believe they have them on five-pay.

 

Unfortunately, my broadcast doesn't include closed captioning. Rats. I was looking forward to giving myself a laughter embolism.

 

Beijim

[EVillageProwler]

ROFL! I'll have to try this, cuz it's the only way I can sit through an airing of CV.

[TerrapinWill]

I find the show to be very entertaining. I watch it not to purchase anything, because obviously that would be insane. But they show coins, which I like, so it's better than I can find on TV at 9pm on a Monday. Probably my favorite deal was 1999-2004 Silver Proof Sets...at a value of 999.99, on Five Pay.......Has anyone ever seen anything they would buy? I really like ASE....I just like a big silver coin....so after seeing them selling "complete set" on MS69 for 899.99, I looked around and found a set that even had the millenium ASE so it wasa 20 coin set for about $400 less.....it's amazing.......so have you ever seen anything worth buying?

[jom]

While these are funny, have to wonder what the folks who NEED close captioning are thinking!

 

Eh, WOT did you say? Speak up boy....

 

jom

[EZ_E]

Probably my favorite deal was 1999-2004 Silver Proof Sets...at a value of 999.99, on Five Pay.......Has anyone ever seen anything they would buy?

 

Unbelievable! That is what the entire 1992-2004 run sells for. I think that the staff at the HSN and the like should not even be permitted to breed.

 

Maybe the closed captions was typed live which increases the likelyhood of typos but this is beyond extreme.

[Dry]

They have to be making money 'cause they are still on. Somebody is buying them.

Wouldnt you love to have that mailing list?

[0john0-migration]

That's about all they are good for is a laugh. Although sometimes they make me want to cry. I have called several times to voice a complaint, but they don't really care.

-john

[EZ_E]

That's about all they are good for is a laugh. Although sometimes they make me want to cry. I have called several times to voice a complaint, but they don't really care.

-john

 

Not as long as the funds keep rolling in.

[topsman]

My favorite line has to be....

 

"OK NOW, WE ARE UNDER 2 PER STATE! WE HAVE LESS THAN 2 PER STATE LEFT! I HAVE TO PUT UP THE 3 MINUTE CLOCK! IF YOU WANT THIS ITEM, YOU BETTER BE ON THAT PHONE AND DIALING AS I SPEAK! OUR 2 PHONE LINES EACH HAVE A CALLER, SO PLEASE HOLD ON THE LINE!"

 

 

And yet that item is back again the next show! And the price has jumped from $949 to $999. And where do they get this "Similar Product Sold Elsewhere Price"? I can't think of many other dealers or purchase outlets that charge more than the vault charges.

 

I've always enjoyed watching the show, and, well USE to find it informational when I first got started collecting, but now to think of how that show could have worped my mind and state of thinking!

 

But I would NEVER even consider buying something from them, I have no iea about their integrity or realiability, but just the prices are outragous!

 

I took a quick look at their website and noticed right off the bat 2 similar lots they were offering that I got on ebay, notice the vast difference....

 

04 Jeff, Nickel Set in pr69

coin valut - $89.99 I got it on ebay for a little under $30

 

03 Clad Quarter Set in Pr69

coin valut - $119.99 I got it on ebay for like $45

 

 

So that works down to show coin valut prices can run about 3 times! 3 times the price you can get it for elsewhere.

 

 

Oh yeah and don't trust those "ENCAPSULATION" services!

[HaydenTubbs]

I don't get cable so I miss out on a lot of fun.

But hey who needs cable, I get alot of laughs here

They aren't to bad when it comes to pricing on their "Rare coins"

They've got some nice ones

It's just stuff like this that gets me laughing Link

You could spend hours...

[Hoot]

Oh, those links are a screech! Ack! $120 for junk halves!

 

Hoot

[topsman]

BUT YOU GET A FREE ALBUM!

 

..... A FREE ALBUM !!!!!

 

[scroll]

They have to be making money 'cause they are still on. Somebody is buying them.

Wouldnt you love to have that mailing list?

 

Oh you should be buying 3 of EVERYTHING!

 

Buy one for yourself, put another in the vault for a rainy day and put the 3rd up on eBay to pay for the other 2. Then when the bill comes pay off the plastic from the auction proceeds.

 

These are REMARKABLE values not found anywhere else at these prices folks!!

 

Well, that's what they would have us to think anyway.

 

I'm just venturing a guess, but it sounds like the closed cap might have been some kind of voice recognition that is not quite ready for prime time, but great fun for late night cable!

[Beijim]

Here are my current favorite Coin Vault colloquialisms:

 

• "Just dial." A parenthetical introduction Robert Chambers inserts before showing an item he anticipates will be too hot to resist. You must order immediately or lose the opportunity, which will never occur again in your lifetime until the next show. Order immediately and robotically using whatever medium (telephone, web site) is available.
   
  
• "Every time you dial." In English, "Every time you order this item."
   
  
• "We're $2.00 per coin." In English, "We charge $2.00 for each coin."
   
  
• "Quantify your rarity." Translation: "Misinterpret the NGC population report to justify the inflated price you paid."
   
  
• "Anacronym." Robert's malapropism for the English word "acronym." He means "acronym" but has invented a fantastic new word I take to mean "an obsolete abbreviation."
   
  
• "Tuyah." A non-word Paul Hollis uses when he intends to say, "To you." See next entry.
   
  
• "Goin out tuyah." A non-phrase Paul uses to mean "that we're shipping to you," as in, "Each of these coins goin out tuyah is gem brilliant uncirculated."
   
  
• "Objectivity." Robert's malapropism for the exact opposite concept, subjectivity. As in, "Once this coin's in an NGC case, all objectivity is gone."
   
  
• "We're not tryin' to get all the cheese, we're just lookin' to get out of the trap." This is Robert's colorful way of alleging that the Coin Vault folks aren't making much money on an item.
   
  
• "Numismatic avalanche." Robert's phrase for the implied premium you'll enjoy because the 10 pounds of About Good silver you just bought is actual coins and not simply bullion."
   
  
• "Do I think these coins are worth the premium? Oh, absolutely." Paul's canonical use of the lawyerly Socratic Method, in which you conduct conversation by asking questions rather than making direct assertions. In Paul's case, all such questions are rhetorical and have the answer, "Oh, absolutely."
   
  
• "That's less than melt." Translation: "Since this is 5-Pay we're talking about, you'll eventually pay about five times melt value for this item."
   
  
• "And change." The greatest part of the next dollar; i.e. $0.95, $0.96, $0.97, $0.98, or $0.99. Example: "Three dollars and change per coin."
   
  
• "I can assure you." Translation: "What I'm about to say is completely unverified. Caveat emptor."
  

Obviously, I love these guys. I love watching the show. Occasionally it's a riot. Occasionally I want to throw an anvil through the screen. Occasionally I just weep.

 

Beijim